I have a lot of group meetings. The topics vary but the timing and structures are generally the same: until that one meeting. One of my larger groups had an entire meeting of unscheduled, deep, vulnerable “here is where I am” conversations. I shared my “red map dot” was sitting at a scenic outlook on a beautiful mountain peak where the sun was shining and the air was clear with perfect ambient temperatures. And I was thankful for these moments of happiness, peace, and clear skies, because I know the only constant thing in life is change.
The next week, I encountered a Monday. It was like my car had come out of gear and rolled out of the scenic outlook; tumbling down the mountain backwards with some roll-overs at the switchbacks. I woke up to a child needing me to come to the rescue, when I needed to be somewhere else. Dealing with that threw me out of my regular routine, and I forgot to grab my breakfast on the way out to door. I stopped to pick some up - making time really tight. A fellow driver on the highway nearly rear-ended a car in front of them, and in avoidance, swerved into my immediate path. The stress of being in a time crunch, the adrenaline of a near-miss on the road, and having to make an unplanned stop exacerbated my movement disorder making the “we’re out of large cups” at the breakfast stop hazardous to my khaki pants. Then the event I was trying to get to canceled at the very last minute, causing disappointment and aggravation to the vendors, and creating another series of intense moments. And that was all before 10 a.m.
At the end of that very long Monday, I was reflecting on my day - and the comedy of errors that it contained. God pointed out how much living from a place of submission to His plans had changed my outlook. A few years ago, I would have reacted to the first situation with irritation, and the selfish belief that my plans were more important than the emergent moment - and would have damaged that relationship. That irritation would have influenced the next moment, spiraling to the next and the next and the next - and I would have ended the day in a seething, angry tangle of emotion finding offense in every moment and leaving a wake of hurt behind me. That lack of control - the “I planned it this way and it should happen as it was planned” would have destroyed so many relationships. Was I put out by the inconvenience of change? Yes. Did it ruin anything? No. Instead, I was able to SEE the peace that God brought me in those moments and how far I’ve come by looking in the rearview.
While I love spending time in the scenic outlook moments, I have learned to treasure the “Mondays”.
Jennifer Dickey, MS
Assistant Director, Thrive!